Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Drowning Me Awake

I cried sand tears
in a dream with shadow-tap-dancers,
their rhythm was my breath,
their darkness my soul.
Veils of shrieking angels
wiped at my scaly cheeks;
the cold flame of our last dinner
raged in rivers of midnight sweat,
drowning me awake
to the lost imprint
on your side of the bed.

25 comments:

Poetry by Kai said...

very sad!

Poetry by Kai said...

thanks

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

wow!

Poetry by Kai said...

pat's a typical man!

Frida said...

I can't decide if it's a poem of longing or scary... It has an element of fear. Not being a poet, I don't have a name for the titillation I felt. It was fun either way.

Amalendu said...

very nice poem...
neatly crafted as you have been doing...

Queen Neetee said...

Incredible!

The deepness of this poem has brought us to the door of your soul.

I love this blatant journey.

Simply awesome pat.

floots said...

beautiful
loved the sand tears image

samuru999 said...

A very deep and sad poem.
I like it very much.

gracie said...

that is brilliant, pat.. powerful.

Anonymous said...

pat

fantastic. really liked this one.

don iannone

sorry for anon post but in the car.

Russell Ragsdale said...

I cannot comment Pat I am stabbed away and dying in the corner. When we were murdering Caesar I was an accidental victim of the passion of the crime. Dark horrors attend me, appathetic to the collateral damage. Thanks though for touching a place where we once lived and were men and husbands.

Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Very raw and direct, it holds an air of helplessness

Sue hardy-Dawson said...

I'd like do a link if thats OK?

polona said...

so intense, so sad!

Masago said...

WOW!

J Cosmo Newbery said...

The impassioned wail of a tormented soul! Sir, I salute you. You have impaled the raw nerve of angst with rapier precision.

Lee said...

I was alright until I got to the "lost imprint
on your side of the bed". Very sad.

Pat Paulk said...

Yes it is. Thank you Kai!!

Thanks Andrew!!

Firida it's a poem about loss. Real elements of fear and longing. Thank you!!

Thanks Shyamalee!!

QNT, your comments are always so rich and wonderful to read. Thank you!!

Thanks Floots!!

Samuru, thank you!!

Thank you Gracie!!

Don, thanks for commenting even if it's anon!!

Russell, WOW!! Thank you!!

Sue, yes it does!! Thank you!! We be linked!!

I know. Thanks Polona!!

Thank you Vaughn!!

J Cosmo, what a wonderful compliment!! Thank you!!

Yes it is. I need to sweep up the sand and serve up some lighter fare. Thanks Lee!!

bre said...

How incredibly sad.

Sue hardy-Dawson said...

Thank-you Pat

Nea said...

OUCH!! Have you been reading my Blue Notes diary again. haha........longing and loss, know them well.

Pris said...

Beautiful, Pat. Keep writing what comes. We don't need 'lighter fare' to entertain us. Wonderful poem.

Osquer said...

Pat, thank you for sharing your depths!

Sharing sorrow is as important as sharing joy. I am comforted to know that someone else is experiencing the same feelings even as I wish neither of us had to.

I agree with Pris. No need to force fluff. Write what comes. And please, continue to share what you write.

Borut said...

Very intense. Sadness almost beyond tears.