Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Three Haiku/Senyru

Cardinals splash
in concrete birdbath--
water bill is due

Birdsong
in afternoon heat
cold beer calls

Cool breeze waggles
Bradford Pear leaves--
birds sit silent

(admittedly I'm a novice at this)

11 comments:

Russell Ragsdale said...

Birdsong is a hoot! your native good humor makes you a natural for the senyru! Thanks Pat, I enjoyed these very much.

Kai said...

very nice.....

i didn't know u have a haiku in u

Amalendu said...

the first two were skewed...up in a rhythm to see a different image in the third line...
expecting the same, the third one was mischievously different...
you prompted me to re-read all...
very well said

floots said...

like 'em
(especially the water bill pun)

Medusa aka expiringpoet said...

Floots said it for me! *lol*
Tks Pat, your poems never fails to provoke, tickle and inspire! Wonderful!

Sue hardy-Dawson said...

I like the first the best it made me giggle

polona said...

like these, pat... the first one is my favourite, too, though i wouldn't object to a glass of beer :)
if my memory serves me well, i did see a few haiku on your blog some time ago...

Don Iannone, D.Div., Ph.D. said...

Must be in the air, or water. I was told to work on my 5-7-5 haiku technique. Being a nonconformist, that will be tough.

Pat Paulk said...

Thanks everyone!! I'm awed and envious at the precision which you "writers" of the short poems nail moments like snowflakes and make them hang there without melting. Don, the western haiku does not follow a strict syllable count. As I understand because of the differences in the language. I've said more than my knowledge allows.

Anonymous said...

very well done.

Borut said...

Enjoy rereading these. The last one is really cool. The outwardly religious framework (a costly affaire) of the first one seems to me to be its cardinal virtue.:)And, did not know cold beer is a species of song bird. Thinking about it, once you have a couple of them in the drinker, they will surely start to sing. Thanks Pat. It's a rare privilege to be able to laugh seriously.:))