Thursday, May 03, 2007

Putting On Airs

We all have personal waste factories
with internal smoke stacks pointing “south”.
There’s no switches, levers , or valves
to control accidental emissions release.
They rumble through working guts of automation
(fine tuned by the hand of God)
in their own inconvenient timing, of course.
Most cover the end of the line with fancy filters,
colorful, sized-to-fit cotton or high dollar silk.
Useless for protecting the immediate environment,
works well for putting on airs, if you get my drift.


mikaelah said...

too bad we all can't just laugh like my son who thinks it is all done for his personal amusement...and it seems to me it is.

polona said...

these things cause many an embarrassement :)

Janice Thomson said...

Oh too funny Pat! Such a delicate way of discussing this human experience.

JaneDoughnut said...

LOL. I take it you go commando, then? Nevermind, I don't really want to know.

lainey said...

cotton or silk
we all f_________

cute and funny, but good point

sage said...

interesting and funny... On a similar note, an engineer once told me that God must be an engineer since he designed the waste system and recreational area together.

Anonymous said...

Haven't been here for a while. The poems here are still a great read.

- Bluesky_Liz

Masago said...

*lol out loud* !!!

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

you write about anything, don't you? :)

floots said...

great laugh to start my day
love those final words
well done pat

Kai C. said...


trinitystar said...

You have a way with Words ... you put a lot of air into it!
Hugs for you

C said...

Dr. Seuss would be envious of such a fine pondering over the regular intervals of expelled intestinal gas.

Flatulence Ponderance should be the title.

Bill said...

Of course, this is completely outside my range of experience . . .

Rethabile said...

Haven't been by in a while. Serves me right for not coming, yes.

Don Iannone said...

Well done, and indeed I get your drift.

Katie McKenna said...

roaring here! :)

You continuously amaze me!

Nea said...

ah Pat......the IBS people of the world, KNOW what you are writing about........

dsnake1 said...

an explosive write, yes.

gautami tripathy said...

"colorful, sized-to-fit cotton or high dollar silk..."

All I can say is..ah!

Pat Paulk said...

Mikaelah, all young boys think it's the funniest thing. When adult comedians make whole shows on it, I get bored real quick.

Polona, not if you move fast enough.

Janice, crudity is a subject best expressed delicately. Thank you!!

Janedoughnut I outted myself without intending to. Not really.

Thank's Doc!!

Sage, way too close sometimes!!

Thanks Liz!! Come when you can.

Vaughn, I think you have an echo, o, o, o

Andrew, I play (or used to) golf with out of bounds, nothing else.

Floots, you got it all the way in Scotland, must've been a strong breeze. Thanks!!

Thanks Kai!!

Trinitystar, I have so much it comes can fill in the blanks. Thank you!!

C, wisdom I can understand.

Bill, I have known some pretty girls I would believe that of, but you...

Rethabile without proper supervision I get into trouble.

Don, I guess I'm a potent guy!!

Thanks Katie!!

Nea, I don't think the unirritated are free understanding either.

Dsnake, you definitely have knowledge of the subject, I can tell.

Gautami, that's better than the "whews" I normally get.